have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
