Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
