I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
This is the high leading the old right now
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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