Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
