How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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