i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
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