plz talk dirty to me
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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