Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
