wrigley field is MILF paradise
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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