I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
