Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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