Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize