hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
