I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Randomize
