ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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