It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
