Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
