Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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