i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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