Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize