AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
