Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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