I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize
