Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
this will be a night to untag.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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