How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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