Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize