you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
