So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
