Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
