Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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