i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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