But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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