Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
