Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Best friends brother. Beat that.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
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