No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
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