he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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