Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Randomize
