he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
