jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
