Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
