have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
