Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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