I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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