she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I could fuck to npr.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
