Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
