I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Randomize
