the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
