pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
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