yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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