Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
