Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
